Shit you needed to recruit our ex coach just to have half a chance this year. You'll be lucky to make the top 8, top four no chance. You keep on believing though Dizzy.
What's this I here you guys want to become a co-tenant at the G. Fark me, you've only got about 40,000 members. So much for the silvertails, too tight to pony up for a membership.
Lol - ooh look, the Collingwood supporter found the search function...... Sooo clever - here, have a scratch and sniff sticker ;) :P
Yep, I'm a Blues supporter since VFL days - I just like the team. i get stoked when they win and pissed off when they don't perform - just like a supporter of any other club.
What you Collingwood mob need to realise is that it's not just a club bashing thing - you're a different breed and the thing that distinguishes the rest of the AFL from you lot is bad teeth, thin skin and an extra chromosome.......... oh and we don't root our sisters.
Oh, and a big membership funded by self-prostitution and break & enter thefts ain't worth bragging about ;)
PS - I sincerely hope my assumption that you've got a good sense of humour is correct - taking the piss out of a Pies supporter with guns is obviously quite risky ... LoL
Always wondered why the mighty? Carlton finished on the bottom in 2002, 003, 005 and 006 and picked up some real good players from the draft and yet Melbourne gets a $5000.000 fine for doing something along the same lines.
Must have something to do with the shiny tails and power brokers.
we can take it,mainly because it makes you all look like morons go pies,sad really that no other team is big enough for this to mean anything, please don't stop belittling yourselves HA HA
Haha - Pies supporters, such a touchy, sensitive bunch - Always guaranteed a good (toothless) bite !
Very admirable, almost inspiring - sorta like watching a down-syndrome race - they are all such special people, so determined and try so hard to be all they can be - but unfortunately genetics has dealt you all a really unfortunate hand.
Try not to lick as many windows this year guys - that windex contains some nasty sh!t !
Getting away from the wobbles for a bit, here's another early Friday funny....Melbourne are found not guilty of tanking but still fined $500K. $500K for been embarassingly shit or just for the privelidge of been investigated? Hahahaha. Oh Andy D, your so crazy.
how on the hell can a team be fined $500k when they have been found not guilty of tanking or what ever and an assistant coach gets rubbed out for 12 months. I thought in this country if you did nothing wrong you didn't pay a penalty boy did I get that wrong. If I was in the head shed of melbourne footbal club I'd get the best I could in soliciters and take the AFL for every penny they thought they might get for the next 50 years, what sought of fine would they have got if they had been found guilty.
I don't follow football and this sought of crap is one of the reasons I don't, so far as the west australian tax payer paying for a new stadium, with fines like that for the innocent the AFL can pay for the stadium themselves
the mighty Brad[last night] reakons they took the 500k because if they actually went for tanking they could loose their license for their pokey machines which brings in 4 m a year,go figure, don't shoot the messenger, the AFL was up to something here thats for sure
Haha, not really mate. I'm not usually one to sling shit at Pies (well not as much as some) - but when I'm given that much ammo the opportunity can't be wasted.
As for the chicken wing comments, I completely agree - it was a low act.
Then again, Didak and co aren't exactly model citizens are they ?
That little ferret avoids a contest as much as his supporters avoid work !
AFL didn't want to say Melbourne Tanked as "no tanking is happening in the AFL" that's why they were found not guilty, but fined. They are too scared of the can of worms this would have opened.
So they just make their own rules to suit.......
I didn't speed to work this morning but if the AFL was in charge I'd expect a fine...
New Primary Teacher ends up at a Collingwood school.
Nervous she thought she would make a good impression and said: "Like me, who supports Collingwood?"
All hands go up bar Annie.
"Annie, who do you support?" she asked
"West Coast Eagles" comes the reply.
Trying to still stay in the good books the teacher asked "Why do you support the Eagles?"
Annie: "Because my parents do"
Teacher: "Well Annie, you dont always have to follow what your parents do. For example what would you be if your Dad is a pimp and criminal, and your mother is a prostitute?"
ADDRESS………………………………………………………………………………………... (this means what is the name of the street your house is in and what is your house number. If unsure of either – check the phone book for details but look under your own name or you will get it wrong)
If address unknown – put a tick here:…………..
DATE OF BIRTH……………………………….. (What day does everybody sing happy birthday to you?)
AGE…………….. (How many years have they been singing it to you?)
MOTHER’S NAME……………………….…………………....(Mum will NOT do. What is her REAL name?)
FATHER’S NAME ( if known )…………………………………………………………...( NO SWEARING )
DO YOU HAVE A CAR? YES / NO IS IT YOURS? YES / NO
REGISTRATION NUMBER…………………………….(found on the piece of tin hanging from the bumper bar)
DO YOU HAVE A DRIVERS LICENCE? YES / NO IS IT YOURS? YES / NO ARE YOU WEARING MAGGIES CLOTHING ON LICENCE PHOTO? YES / NO
COULD YOU DRIVE PLAYERS, MATCH COMMITTEE OR OTHER SUPPORTERS TO: a) HOME GAMES YES / NO b) AWAY GAMES (to keep costs down) YES / NO
DO YOU HAVE A WASHING MACHINE? YES / NO WOULD YOU BE PREPARED TO HELP WASH OUR TEAM FOOTY GEAR? YES / NO (tick which……..socks….shorts….guernseys….jockstraps….hankies….bandages …. )
DO YOU OWN A BEACH SHACK? YES / NO COULD WE USE IT FOR THE PLAYERS “END OF SEASON TRIP?” YES / NO
DO YOU HAVE ANY CHILDREN? YES / NO ARE THEY YOURS? YES / NO WOULD ANY OF THEM BE INTERESTED IN PLAYING FOR THE MAGGIES? YES / NO a) BOYS YES / NO b) GIRLS YES / NO HOW OLD ARE THEY? 1 – 10, 11 – 20, 21 – 30, 31 – 40, or don’t know?
DO YOU HAVE ANY LARGE FOOTBALL TROPHIES (no name tags ) THAT YOU WOULD BE WILLING TO DONATE TO THE CLUB FOR OUR TROPHY CABINET? YES / NO
WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED IN ATTENDING OUR END OF SEASON DINNER? YES / NO COULD YOU BRING ANYTHING ALONG ON THE NIGHT? (e.g. fairy bread, party pies, cordial, plastic cups, jelly ) YES / NO
ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? YES / NO WOULD YOU BE WILLING TO LEAD OUR SUPPORTERS IN PRAYER: a) BEFORE HOME GAMES? YES / NO b) BEFORE AWAY GAMES? YES / NO c) BEFORE WE PLAY THE EAGLES? YES / NO d) START TO FINISH OF A EAGLES GAME? YES /NO
PART TWO – I.Q TEST
1) PICK THE TV SHOW (circle the right name from the clues given )
BLANKETY______________ Cheque / Blanket / Blanks / Donation / don’t know I DREAM OF_____________ a premiership / Chris Judd / Jeannie / having money / don’t know STAR TREK, THE NEXT____ Footy Show / AFL team / AFL Draft / Generation / don’t know GET_____________________ John Worsfold / Lost / rid of Malthouse / Smart / don’t know HEY HEY IT’S ___________ a June Premiership / smoko / Saturday / another defeat / don’t know WHO WANTS TO BE _____ a Millionaire / a Collingwood member / stupid / Leon Davis / don’t know
2) PICK THE ODD ONE OUT ( circle the odd one from the lists below )
FEBRUARY 30th / MAY 38th / JUNE 40th / OCTOBER 33rd / APRIL 1st / don’t know SPOON / SOON / MOON / BOON / CHEESE / GOON / SWOON / don’t know A, B, C, D, 4, E, F, G, H, I, don’t know WOEWODIN / ROCCA / CLEMENT / BUCKLEY / HOLLAND / (one wasn’t poached from another club) MCG / SCG / AAMI STADIUM / SUBIACO / GABBA / WEMBLEY / don’t know
3) WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE FOLLOWING SENTENCE? “I THINKS THE MAGPIES IS THE BESTEST TEAM IN OSTRAYLIA”
IS IT: a) BAD SPELING b) BAD GRAMMA c) BAD GRANDMA d) DON’T KNOW
To find out if your membership application has been successful, please put a stamp on both sides of an envelope and leave one side blank. We will advise you by return mail.
BONUS: Please list in order your preferred complimentary Collingwood Membership Surgery that comes with every successful membership application. We will try to allocate you a bed in an appropriate hospital, as one becomes available.
a) MOUTH ENLARGEMENT. b) ONE EYE REMOVED.( left or right ) c) BRAIN REMOVED
When you are going to change something to suit your needs, change everything including the last sentence!!!
The whole thing was from Pommyland no Australia because I'd like to see someone get BBC 2 out here even if their toilet seat is broken!!!
Not that it bothers us, because while you are picking on Collingwood you are not taking the piss out of some poor prick who may be offended and fight back
I'm a swans supporter, I thinks its ours to loose this year, like it was hawthorns last year. Since the 96 GF sydney have missed the finals twice, so we deserve a few flags. The Dockers if they play like they did late last year are capable, they just need to beleive in themselves. The Eagles are improving, but injurys hurt them to much. Hawthorn have the best talent but choke under pressure. Adelaide over acheived last season thanks to an easy draw. The current Collingwood team's best footy appears to be behind them.
Sorry downhill for sydney now you have the overpaid and under achieving Tippett - for a full forward an average goal rate of 1.8 is pretty poor :-). Tippetts only value is to get crumbers at his feet to gather his dropped marks. If he marks them he is a shocking set shot but sometimes good with snap shots on the run where he doesn't get time to think about the kick. Wouldn't be putting money on him to kick set shots at all.
Adelaide may have had an easy draw last year but they have some great upcoming and capable younger players added to last years team - especially Crouch. They will be in it again this year as well.
.thumbnail.jpg "More terrible conditions ;)")
the_dude84
Posts: 145
Date Joined: 15/03/11
(No subject)
opsrey
Posts: 1200
Date Joined: 05/10/07
Gee Alfred knows a lot about the supporter group !
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
LOL
Better to be hated than pitied!
Keep on hating, means we're doing alright.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
No, you're just a bunch of
No, you're just a bunch of inbred toothless rednecks who are fun to pay out on ............ and pitied ;) :P lol
opsrey
Posts: 1200
Date Joined: 05/10/07
+1
Legend!
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
LOL
Water off a magpies back Dizzy.
Looking forward to you nailing your colours to the mast BTW.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Farkin Gold
Your a blues flog. LOL
Shit you needed to recruit our ex coach just to have half a chance this year. You'll be lucky to make the top 8, top four no chance. You keep on believing though Dizzy.
What's this I here you guys want to become a co-tenant at the G. Fark me, you've only got about 40,000 members. So much for the silvertails, too tight to pony up for a membership.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Lol - ooh look, the
Lol - ooh look, the Collingwood supporter found the search function...... Sooo clever - here, have a scratch and sniff sticker ;) :P
Yep, I'm a Blues supporter since VFL days - I just like the team. i get stoked when they win and pissed off when they don't perform - just like a supporter of any other club.
What you Collingwood mob need to realise is that it's not just a club bashing thing - you're a different breed and the thing that distinguishes the rest of the AFL from you lot is bad teeth, thin skin and an extra chromosome.......... oh and we don't root our sisters.
Oh, and a big membership funded by self-prostitution and break & enter thefts ain't worth bragging about ;)
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
LOL
I can't believe name callings the best you've got Dizzy. Surely not from a bloke who's taken on the courts and won, changed government policy etc.
You get white line fever do ya?
Hope you don't try a chicken wing tackle on me when we eventually meet one day.
BTW Dizzy, I only had to use the search function because you were too embaressed to admit you were a bluebagger.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Haha - I use much more civil
Haha - I use much more civil & advanced language in those situations.
I'm just keeping this at a very basic level so you can understand. :P
Here, I'll make all the text bigger for you too now so you don't have to get your Aunty Bruce to read it for you
:P
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Love it
Bold black text on a white background. How good does that look!
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Haha. :P
Haha. :P
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
PS - I sincerely hope my
PS - I sincerely hope my assumption that you've got a good sense of humour is correct - taking the piss out of a Pies supporter with guns is obviously quite risky ... LoL
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Lot
Takes a lot to ruffle this magpies feathers Dizzy.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Apparently not :
Apparently not ;) :P
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Delusional
You put it up for a bite, you got one, doesn't mean you ruffled my feathers though. (need a head scratching emoticon)
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
sea-kem
Posts: 15132
Date Joined: 30/11/09
I think Dizzy's foing for
I think Dizzy's foing for the how to make friends not enemies award.....not!! Judging by a few of his posts lately.
Love the West!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Really ?i thought I was just
Really ?
i thought I was just on a roll with the Collingwood banter.
Bugger, I'd better go and check my post history.... LOL
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
I know mate, just digging.But
I know mate, just digging.
But I actually put it up because I thought it was funny as hell and wanted to share.
The bites were just inevitable.
carnarvonite
Posts: 8692
Date Joined: 24/07/07
Tanking?
Always wondered why the mighty? Carlton finished on the bottom in 2002, 003, 005 and 006 and picked up some real good players from the draft and yet Melbourne gets a $5000.000 fine for doing something along the same lines.
Must have something to do with the shiny tails and power brokers.
uncle
Posts: 9598
Date Joined: 10/02/07
different breed
your right there,have a look at yourselfs,who would wannabee that LOL
all aggressive fish love bigjohnsjigs
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Collingwood supporter grammar
Collingwood supporter grammar at its best ......... I rest my case.
:P
uncle
Posts: 9598
Date Joined: 10/02/07
all aggressive fish love bigjohnsjigs
sea-kem
Posts: 15132
Date Joined: 30/11/09
Ha ha classic. I want more
Ha ha classic. I want more more
Love the West!
carnarvonite
Posts: 8692
Date Joined: 24/07/07
Teflon
Why do you think teflon was invented?
So all the crap that is put on us Collingwood supporters won't stick, unlike a lots of others who get highly upset if you bag their teams.
sea-kem
Posts: 15132
Date Joined: 30/11/09
Gawd John . That is the
Gawd John . That is the worst joke ;)
Love the West!
trymyluck
Posts: 908
Date Joined: 06/05/12
Haha ripper !!
Haha ripper !!
chris raff
Posts: 3257
Date Joined: 09/02/10
Sorry guys .. I usually don't
Sorry guys .. I usually don't resort to these tactics being a dockers supporter ..but hey
“Intelligence is like a four-wheel drive. It only allows you to get stuck in more remote places.”
Justin M
Posts: 1207
Date Joined: 14/01/13
Is that Joffas missus?
Is that Joffas missus?
opsrey
Posts: 1200
Date Joined: 05/10/07
Naa , not Joffa's missus
Its Eddies sister
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
In
Might as well get in while you can boys, gonna be a big year for the Pies.
I see our ex-party boy is making a bouncing impression with the Weags. Gold!
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Lol - that could actually be
Lol - that could actually be Eddie in his cross-dressing outfit.
spanishmackeral
Posts: 940
Date Joined: 05/01/11
such a waste of a good
such a waste of a good shirt...
sea-kem
Posts: 15132
Date Joined: 30/11/09
And a big pair of tits.
And a big pair of tits.
Love the West!
barneyboy
Posts: 1392
Date Joined: 08/01/09
butterfly catching is still
butterfly catching, regardless of the team.
FEEEISH ONNN!!!
dumper
Posts: 1027
Date Joined: 03/04/08
2013 Anzac Day clash
sea-kem
Posts: 15132
Date Joined: 30/11/09
Ha ha ha that's gold.
Ha ha ha that's gold.
Love the West!
carnarvonite
Posts: 8692
Date Joined: 24/07/07
Number 39
Wonder if number 39 is related to Hapoate?
tiimmbo
Posts: 695
Date Joined: 16/08/09
even as a Bombers fan I think
even as a Bombers fan I think that is pretty funny
uncle
Posts: 9598
Date Joined: 10/02/07
bring it on boys
we can take it,mainly because it makes you all look like morons go pies,sad really that no other team is big enough for this to mean anything, please don't stop belittling yourselves HA HA
all aggressive fish love bigjohnsjigs
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Haha - such a touchy,
Haha - Pies supporters, such a touchy, sensitive bunch - Always guaranteed a good (toothless) bite !
Very admirable, almost inspiring - sorta like watching a down-syndrome race - they are all such special people, so determined and try so hard to be all they can be - but unfortunately genetics has dealt you all a really unfortunate hand.
Try not to lick as many windows this year guys - that windex contains some nasty sh!t !
:P
Justin M
Posts: 1207
Date Joined: 14/01/13
Getting away from the wobbles
Getting away from the wobbles for a bit, here's another early Friday funny....Melbourne are found not guilty of tanking but still fined $500K. $500K for been embarassingly shit or just for the privelidge of been investigated? Hahahaha. Oh Andy D, your so crazy.
meglodon
Posts: 5981
Date Joined: 17/06/10
I can't understand that 500k for not being guilty
how on the hell can a team be fined $500k when they have been found not guilty of tanking or what ever and an assistant coach gets rubbed out for 12 months. I thought in this country if you did nothing wrong you didn't pay a penalty boy did I get that wrong. If I was in the head shed of melbourne footbal club I'd get the best I could in soliciters and take the AFL for every penny they thought they might get for the next 50 years, what sought of fine would they have got if they had been found guilty.
I don't follow football and this sought of crap is one of the reasons I don't, so far as the west australian tax payer paying for a new stadium, with fines like that for the innocent the AFL can pay for the stadium themselves
rant over
uncle
Posts: 9598
Date Joined: 10/02/07
sports talk
the mighty Brad[last night] reakons they took the 500k because if they actually went for tanking they could loose their license for their pokey machines which brings in 4 m a year,go figure, don't shoot the messenger, the AFL was up to something here thats for sure
all aggressive fish love bigjohnsjigs
sea-kem
Posts: 15132
Date Joined: 30/11/09
Agree there Uncle. The AFL
Agree there Uncle. The AFL 2ic couldn't wouldn't give a definition when asked what tanking was.
Love the West!
uncle
Posts: 9598
Date Joined: 10/02/07
depends what club
the silver tails get extra money to pay to a chicken wing tackler and eye gouger!
all aggressive fish love bigjohnsjigs
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Don't expect
Don't expect a response from Dizzy, he's a pie hater not a pro blue.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Dizzy
Posts: 753
Date Joined: 21/02/11
Haha, not really mate.I'm not
Haha, not really mate.
I'm not usually one to sling shit at Pies (well not as much as some) - but when I'm given that much ammo the opportunity can't be wasted.
As for the chicken wing comments, I completely agree - it was a low act.
Then again, Didak and co aren't exactly model citizens are they ?
That little ferret avoids a contest as much as his supporters avoid work !
;P
Paul H
Posts: 2104
Date Joined: 18/01/07
AFL didn't want to say
AFL didn't want to say Melbourne Tanked as "no tanking is happening in the AFL" that's why they were found not guilty, but fined. They are too scared of the can of worms this would have opened.
So they just make their own rules to suit.......
I didn't speed to work this morning but if the AFL was in charge I'd expect a fine...
Youtube Channel - FishOnLine Productions
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbUVNa-ViyGm_FTDSv4Nqzg/videos
crasny1
Posts: 7009
Date Joined: 16/10/08
New Primary Teacher ends up
New Primary Teacher ends up at a Collingwood school.
Nervous she thought she would make a good impression and said: "Like me, who supports Collingwood?"
All hands go up bar Annie.
"Annie, who do you support?" she asked
"West Coast Eagles" comes the reply.
Trying to still stay in the good books the teacher asked "Why do you support the Eagles?"
Annie: "Because my parents do"
Teacher: "Well Annie, you dont always have to follow what your parents do. For example what would you be if your Dad is a pimp and criminal, and your mother is a prostitute?"
Annie: "A COLLINWOOD SUPPORTER!!!!"
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
uncle
Posts: 9598
Date Joined: 10/02/07
come on
lets get then all out, there must be new ones
all aggressive fish love bigjohnsjigs
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Jacking off
Now we need one of those jacking-off icons uncle.
Bring something funny to the table at least guys, give us pies supporters a laugh as well with something fresh.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
chris raff
Posts: 3257
Date Joined: 09/02/10
Casuarina Prison receives
Casuarina Prison receives these every year..
Collingwood Magpies
MEMBERSHIP APPLICATION FORM
NAME…………………………………………………………………….( 2 mistakes allowed )
NAME…………………………………………………………………….( 2nd chance )
ADDRESS………………………………………………………………………………………...
(this means what is the name of the street your house is in and what is your house number.
If unsure of either – check the phone book for details but look under your own name or you will get it wrong)
If address unknown – put a tick here:…………..
DATE OF BIRTH………………………………..
(What day does everybody sing happy birthday to you?)
AGE……………..
(How many years have they been singing it to you?)
MOTHER’S NAME……………………….…………………....(Mum will NOT do. What is her REAL name?)
FATHER’S NAME ( if known )…………………………………………………………...( NO SWEARING )
DO YOU HAVE A CAR? YES / NO
IS IT YOURS? YES / NO
REGISTRATION NUMBER…………………………….(found on the piece of tin hanging from the bumper bar)
DO YOU HAVE A DRIVERS LICENCE? YES / NO
IS IT YOURS? YES / NO
ARE YOU WEARING MAGGIES CLOTHING ON LICENCE PHOTO? YES / NO
COULD YOU DRIVE PLAYERS, MATCH COMMITTEE OR OTHER SUPPORTERS TO:
a) HOME GAMES YES / NO
b) AWAY GAMES (to keep costs down) YES / NO
DO YOU HAVE A WASHING MACHINE? YES / NO
WOULD YOU BE PREPARED TO HELP WASH OUR TEAM FOOTY GEAR? YES / NO
(tick which……..socks….shorts….guernseys….jockstraps….hankies….bandages …. )
DO YOU OWN A BEACH SHACK? YES / NO
COULD WE USE IT FOR THE PLAYERS “END OF SEASON TRIP?” YES / NO
DO YOU HAVE ANY CHILDREN? YES / NO
ARE THEY YOURS? YES / NO
WOULD ANY OF THEM BE INTERESTED IN PLAYING FOR THE MAGGIES? YES / NO
a) BOYS YES / NO
b) GIRLS YES / NO
HOW OLD ARE THEY? 1 – 10, 11 – 20, 21 – 30, 31 – 40, or don’t know?
DO YOU HAVE ANY LARGE FOOTBALL TROPHIES (no name tags ) THAT YOU WOULD BE
WILLING TO DONATE TO THE CLUB FOR OUR TROPHY CABINET? YES / NO
WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED IN ATTENDING OUR END OF SEASON DINNER? YES / NO
COULD YOU BRING ANYTHING ALONG ON THE NIGHT?
(e.g. fairy bread, party pies, cordial, plastic cups, jelly ) YES / NO
ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? YES / NO
WOULD YOU BE WILLING TO LEAD OUR SUPPORTERS IN PRAYER:
a) BEFORE HOME GAMES? YES / NO
b) BEFORE AWAY GAMES? YES / NO
c) BEFORE WE PLAY THE EAGLES? YES / NO
d) START TO FINISH OF A EAGLES GAME? YES /NO
1) PICK THE TV SHOW (circle the right name from the clues given )
BLANKETY______________ Cheque / Blanket / Blanks / Donation / don’t know
I DREAM OF_____________ a premiership / Chris Judd / Jeannie / having money / don’t know
STAR TREK, THE NEXT____ Footy Show / AFL team / AFL Draft / Generation / don’t know
GET_____________________ John Worsfold / Lost / rid of Malthouse / Smart / don’t know
HEY HEY IT’S ___________ a June Premiership / smoko / Saturday / another defeat / don’t know
WHO WANTS TO BE _____ a Millionaire / a Collingwood member / stupid / Leon Davis / don’t know
2) PICK THE ODD ONE OUT ( circle the odd one from the lists below )
FEBRUARY 30th / MAY 38th / JUNE 40th / OCTOBER 33rd / APRIL 1st / don’t know
SPOON / SOON / MOON / BOON / CHEESE / GOON / SWOON / don’t know
A, B, C, D, 4, E, F, G, H, I, don’t know
WOEWODIN / ROCCA / CLEMENT / BUCKLEY / HOLLAND / (one wasn’t poached from another club)
MCG / SCG / AAMI STADIUM / SUBIACO / GABBA / WEMBLEY / don’t know
3) WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE FOLLOWING SENTENCE?
“I THINKS THE MAGPIES IS THE BESTEST TEAM IN OSTRAYLIA”
IS IT:
a) BAD SPELING
b) BAD GRAMMA
c) BAD GRANDMA
d) DON’T KNOW
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GOOD LUCK
“Intelligence is like a four-wheel drive. It only allows you to get stuck in more remote places.”
crasny1
Posts: 7009
Date Joined: 16/10/08
Letters to Collingwood
Letters to Collingwood Council.
1. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.
2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
3. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.
5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off.
6. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.
9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
10. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy.
11. The next door neighbour has got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it any more.
12. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.
13. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.
14. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces.
15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.
16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.
18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.
19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.
21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
LOL
Crasny, that's almost as lame as Oscar Pistorius' excuse for killing his girlfriend.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
Lamby
Posts: 3145
Date Joined: 04/08/09
"Roses are red & violets are
"Roses are red & violets are just gorgeous" so gushed Reeva Steenkamp on her way to surprise Oscar Pistorius!
All jokes aside I think his defence doesn't really have a leg to stand on!
Thankyou & goodnight ladies & gentlemen
carnarvonite
Posts: 8692
Date Joined: 24/07/07
Change everything
When you are going to change something to suit your needs, change everything including the last sentence!!!
The whole thing was from Pommyland no Australia because I'd like to see someone get BBC 2 out here even if their toilet seat is broken!!!
Not that it bothers us, because while you are picking on Collingwood you are not taking the piss out of some poor prick who may be offended and fight back
crasny1
Posts: 7009
Date Joined: 16/10/08
LOL
Sprung
.
You got it in one. I should have edited better!! But if it wasnt for Collingwood who could we crack jokes at
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
big john
Posts: 8771
Date Joined: 20/07/06
Well
I've always found seeth afwican's pretty good to take the piss out of.
WA based manufacturer and supplier of premium leadhead jigs, fligs, bucktail jigs, 'bulletproof' soft plastic jig heads and XOS bullet jig heads.
Jigs available online in my web store!
crasny1
Posts: 7009
Date Joined: 16/10/08
I can hack that
Been here 36yrs, and still have an accent
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact!!" _ Elon Musk
the_dude84
Posts: 145
Date Joined: 15/03/11
I don't see why everyone will
I don't see why everyone will just admit Sydney will go back to back this year, beating the Dockers in the GF!
carnarvonite
Posts: 8692
Date Joined: 24/07/07
Where??
Where can I get some of what you have been smoking?
the_dude84
Posts: 145
Date Joined: 15/03/11
I'm a swans supporter, I
I'm a swans supporter, I thinks its ours to loose this year, like it was hawthorns last year. Since the 96 GF sydney have missed the finals twice, so we deserve a few flags. The Dockers if they play like they did late last year are capable, they just need to beleive in themselves. The Eagles are improving, but injurys hurt them to much. Hawthorn have the best talent but choke under pressure. Adelaide over acheived last season thanks to an easy draw. The current Collingwood team's best footy appears to be behind them.
Contenders
Hawthorn
Sydney
Dockers
Collywobbles
WCE
Pretenders
Richmond
Carlton
Nth Melbourne
ST Kilda
Essendon
Every other team are basket cases!
Paul H
Posts: 2104
Date Joined: 18/01/07
Sorry downhill for sydney
Sorry downhill for sydney now you have the overpaid and under achieving Tippett - for a full forward an average goal rate of 1.8 is pretty poor :-). Tippetts only value is to get crumbers at his feet to gather his dropped marks. If he marks them he is a shocking set shot but sometimes good with snap shots on the run where he doesn't get time to think about the kick. Wouldn't be putting money on him to kick set shots at all.
Adelaide may have had an easy draw last year but they have some great upcoming and capable younger players added to last years team - especially Crouch. They will be in it again this year as well.
Cheers
Youtube Channel - FishOnLine Productions
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbUVNa-ViyGm_FTDSv4Nqzg/videos
the_dude84
Posts: 145
Date Joined: 15/03/11
As a bloods supporter I can't
As a bloods supporter I can't understand why we pursued him! Not like we need him! Why did the cows brach salary cap rules to keep him?